Alias:
Mr. P. Chruchill.
Criminal ID:
001 FKSuffering Delusion
Correction Facility.
Captured after climbing the system’s delusions naked, setting them on fire and attempting to free other lab monkeys through relentless truth-bomb deployment.
Charges:
- Committing public indecency, like taking casual Fridays too literally.
- Possessing unnamed substances.
- Flinging pineapples and unsolicited truth bombs at bystanders.
- Breaking into a zoo while drunk, forming a cult and causing a riot.
- Teaching a parrot to shout ‘bullsh*t’, causing academic distress.
- Lighting a cigar at a ‘Positive thinking’ TED talk, and claiming it really sparked the flame.
- Shouting ‘It’s all a f*cking façade’ outside a pre-school.
Psychological Assessment:
- Displays high intelligence, erratic behaviour and compulsive truth-telling.
- Operates with an internal bullsh*t detector. When exposed to news media, exhibits verbal resistance and pineapple-based symbolism.
- Demonstrates strong self-awareness, but chooses not to give a f*ck about performing moral superiority.
